AverageHumor

dulect:

no need to thank me

your credit card will do

(via pizza)

whiteblackjesus:

internetexplorers:

when children do things and u just wanna murder them

like be children

(via pizza)

ju-ke:

i’m tasteless but so is water and we all need that

(Source: neptunain, via pizza)

scalded:

aimmyarrowshigh:

I wish we said “fancy” in America. As in, “I fancy you.” It’s such a more agreeable term than “I have a crush on you.”  What’s a crush? Like, I AM A BOA CONSTRICTOR AND I AM GOING TO IMMOBILIZE YOU WITH MY MISPLACED AND OBSESSIVE AFFECTION.  “I fancy you” is like, you’re so shiny and glittery and I just want to put you on a shelf and look at you for a while ‘cause you’re fancy.

*vomits*

(Source: aimmyarrowshigh, via perks-of-being-chinese)

breakfastburritoe:

dog for president. no wars. only tail wagging. and smiles. dog.

(via joshpeck)

you-are-my-nakama:

Is that Dwayne the Brock Johnson?

you-are-my-nakama:

Is that Dwayne the Brock Johnson?

(Source: jaidefinichon, via ruinedchildhood)

carry-on-my-wayward-butt:

guceubcuesu:

hey

image

Watchu got there

image

a skull that connects to my spine hbu

(via perks-of-being-chinese)

its:

going:

down:

im:

yelling:

timber:

you

better

move

you

better

masturbate

(via guy)

suspend:

HOW DO YOU EVEN CHOOSE A PROFILE PICTURE LIKE THAT THING IS SO STRESSFUL

(via guy)

xxxkit:

imagine niagara falls….. but chocolate milk

(via hi)

wifibox:

looking at my blog like 

image

(via perks-of-being-chinese)